What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
