Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
