Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
