I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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