38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
