I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
