First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
