in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
