When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize