the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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