A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
