I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
