piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize