Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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