we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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