How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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