I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
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