Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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