But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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