I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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