Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
