Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
