He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
