If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
