So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Randomize
