I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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