Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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