And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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