no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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