As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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