I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
