Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
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I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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