my soul wont recognize me after tonight
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
tell me about the fingering
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