I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
