before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
