i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
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