i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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