Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize