i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize