Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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