drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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