I accidentally had phone sex last night
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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