The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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