He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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