If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My feet surprised me
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize