belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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