turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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