I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
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