even my farts smell like vagina
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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