Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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