i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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